Whew... I Dodged a Bullet

My Dr. and Friend, Dr. Ian Smith

Thank you all for your support during this most troubling time. As many of you know, I recently sustained an injury to my foot. After hours of careful examination by my personal physician and part-time roommate, Dr. Ian Smith, it was determined that my injury will not require surgery! Dr. Ian did say that my injury will require hundreds of hours of deep tissue massage and hot tub time. BTW, Dr. Ian says surgery is for pussies. Real men gut it out with therapy and massage.

Look at All That Meat!

Look for me in new Subway Restaurant ads with Jared! I tell him the great thing about Subway sandwiches is that they have more meat than burgers do. A gay guy wouldn't do that. Nope. A gay guy would be doing ads for Red Lobster and talking about how great their Shrimp Scampi and Parrot Bay Jumbo Coconut Shrimp are as well as how reasonable $14.95 is for these amazingly delectable dinners. Not Michael Straightman! I want more meat between my buns!

Welcome to My House

This is my place to get the story out my way. Here you will find things that substantiate that I am very, very straight. As a matter of fact, you may want to keep your ladies away from this site. Let's just say that I encode each web page with Axe Body Spray, so I am not liable for their actions.

Thanks again for stopping by and keep coming back to see exactly how not gay I am! Like for instance the hat I am wearing... it is so not gay!

Can you imagine a gay guy wearing that hat? I can't. They would probably shop at Barney's for a winter hat and select the Barneys New York Persian Lamb Hat and pay $350.00 for it. They might even try to create their own look by accessorizing it with a Barneys New York Cashmere Scarf for $195.00. The 12 Color striped cashmere scarf is made in Scotland and oh so soft! Not me, I am wearing something Ed Skiba, our Assistant Equipment Manager gave me for free! Look, I know a guy named Ed. A gay guy would know someone named Edward. Not Michael Straightman...not gay!